children

The attitude of a 12-year-old

In the parenting world, I'm in what you could call the 'Sweet Spot'.

No nappies.

No more breastfeeding.

No more naps.

They can feed themselves.

They're all in school.

The Sweet Spot.

But, it's not gonna last for long.

My eldest is 12.

And there are more and more moments that reveal themselves to tell me that I'm slowly (not slow enough) coming out of that Sweet Spot.

Teenage attitude has peaked its head out.

And it hits you like, "WHAT WAS THAT?"

And then you go into this denial.

"Oh no no no," you're thinking.

That wasn't really attitude. That was an 'accident'.

But then it happens again.

And again.

Three months of this attitude that pops up more and more makes you, 

FORCES YOU

to get a grip and realise that the hormones have taken control.

Am I doomed?

Am I no longer in that Sweet Spot?

Those hormones are just crazy.

Not only does my daughter talk smack,

she knows how to negotiate, argue a good point, challenge my logic, and persist until I say yes.

I admit, she's good.

(She didn't get those skills from me. My husband's the negotiator. Among other things.)

The other thing about hormones is that I've noticed how much her body is changing.

Mostly for the good, but sometimes it's not fun for her.

And I can blame some of it from all the screen/mobile/device usage:

She's been complaining about spinal pain and headaches more frequently.

Before these changes started, I can't even remember her complaining about those things before.

And since her body has entered into that inevitable phase of puberty, she's come to me saying,

"Mom, can you give me an adjustment. My head is hurting a little."

And this week over half-term, she's had a different schedule, doing different things and activities including a lot of travel, and she's been complaining about feeling discomfort in her back.

And tonight I gave her her 3rd adjustment.

Each time she has laid down on the adjusting bench, I've noticed how her body is going through a big growth spurt.

There's so much development going on.

And I can see some things that are new and different too.

So, like I do for everyone else I adjust, I ask things.

This week I asked my daughter, "Are you excited or nervous about going back to school next week?"

Predictably, she answered, "What? Uhhhh, nope. Um I don't know."

She didn't know.

She's not aware enough.

Also, she's a little stubborn about sharing her feelings or insecurities with me.

But that's another issue I'm working on.

Teenagers go through incredible changes, and it's very important to help support their bodies go through them as best as possible.

The wonderful thing about my daughter's changes is that she's aware enough to know that she needs an adjustment.

There are some weeks where I don't adjust her at all.

And then like this past week, she gets three.

Sometimes our children need those boosts.

We as parents, especially as mums, know when our babies are not at 100%.

It's like the light in their eyes is dimmed.

Or they smell different.

Or, they sound differently when they talk to us.

We know.

That's when they need an adjustment the most.

Keeping their nervous systems and bodies in alignment and balance is so helpful in allowing them grow into their fullest potential.

To help them continually be their best.

So, if you sense that your child is going through a growth spurt, or some big change, or for any reason, bring them in for an adjustment.

One adjustment for a child goes a looong way.

See you at your next adjustment!

— Dr MaryAnne

 

She thought she was cheating on me

I’m having an affair!

One of my long-term lovely wonderful practice members said that to me recently.

"I didn't know what to say to you. I feel like I'm having an affair. I'm cheating on you!"

She was in with her 6-week-old baby for their weekly adjustment.

"Oh, I feel so bad!"

Yup. She was serious.

I could tell that she genuinely felt bad.

"I'm taking her to the osteopath next week."

OMG.

WHAT?

That's what she feels bad about?

"Oh don't be silly," is what I said back to her.

I can understand her feelings because she's been coming to see me for her adjustments way back when she was pregnant with her first child.

With all my long-term practice members, it's an honour and a joy to adjust people for such an extended period of time.

That's the practice I've built.

Family Wellness.

For life.

That's what it's all about.

And I also know that there are many other experts that are excellent and able to help many people as well.

Including osteopaths.

Most of the osteopaths I've met are great.

They see many babies as well and they do similar things that I do.

That's because the practices are quite similar.

It's important to do what you think and feel is best for yourself and your children.

Who I am is just another expert who will always serve you and give the best care, advice, and support possible.

People ask me questions all the time, and I will always asses the situation and give my best most knowledgable advice possible.

If I don't know the answer, then I'll say, "I don't know."

My practice member wasn't cheating on me. 

No affair happening here.

Plus, she was being honest! 

That's not having an affair.

She didn't even go to the other expert yet, so no affair even happened!

The bottom line is, if chiropractic care helps your life and health, and you choose me, then I'll always be available to help and serve you with the best of my abilities.

My passion and mission is to help as many babies, children, and families to live their most healthy and extraordinary lives.

I believe that chiropractic care is a huge component of achieving that.

Osteopathy, massage, physiotherapy, acupuncture, or other body healing modalities all play a part in helping achieve health, too.

It's how and what you find to help your body heal itself, where it's designed to reorganise to higher levels of health.

Chiropractic will always be a part of my life for me, for my health as well as my family's.

I definitely need other expert help to keep me energised and fully functional.

And I also have a much-loved one that brings me a whole lotta pleasure 3-4 times a week:

Red wine!

Cheers!

See you at your next adjustment!

— Dr MaryAnne

 

I'm moving!

Don't worry!

I'm only relocating 5 minutes away.

It's time to make a change.

Last week I announced that I was going to share some news.

Now I'm ready to tell you all!

It took me a few months to simmer with the idea, and once I made the decision, I knew it was the right thing to do.

I'm moving my practice back into my house.

In Streatham Hill.

Overall, this move is better for me.

The main reason is because I'm a mum.

And children don't stay little very long.

Time flies.

And my priority in life - the most important thing to me - is my family.

So, moving my practice back into my house is the best thing for me now so I can juggle my family life, and my practice life.

Ultimately, I know it's what will allow me to serve you better.

So, my new address for my practice is:

2 Wavertree Rd, SW2 3SW

My first day adjusting at the new address, my house, will be on Tuesday 30th January.

So, in two weeks when you come to your adjustment don't come to 44 Lancaster!

I'll be sending out texts to people to make sure there's no mistake. 

I wouldn't want you to come to Lancaster and I'm not there! 

That would stress you and me out.

I don't want that to happen.

Parking is not as easy since it's just near the Streatham Hill high street. 

But, if there isn't a car in front of my driveway, feel free to park right in front. No problem!

If you have any questions, please hit reply and let me know!

I'm looking forward to seeing all of you at my new practice location!

In the meantime, see you later on this week for your next adjustment.

— Dr MaryAnne
 

Moms and CEOs

Generally, moms in the household run the show.

The other day during one of my training sessions with my training group, we were discussing how it's the moms who run the household.

(We're all women in the group.)

There were certain theories about that.

No one could point to the real reason why.

Or, we just all couldn't agree on the best answer.

My theory is based on the different brains that men and women have.

(Or if one person's brain is more female than male.)

It's all about the neurology of the person.

It's well known that women's brains use more synapses that cross the hemispheres.

When men use their brains, there are fewer synapses crossing the hemispheres, and more synapses in just one side.

Which leads me to my theory about women doing more jobs.

We have what is called 'diffuse awareness'. 

Men are single-focused.

Jobs and activities at home on the domestic front are often chaotic, and there's a plethora of things to do and to get done.

Kids are running around everywhere.

Laundry needs to get done.

The cat needs to be fed.

Dinner needs to be prepared (what the hell do I cook for dinner tonight).

And the list goes on and on.

Women are generally better are assessing and tackling these jobs at the same time.

Men need to do one thing at a time.

Of course, I'm generalising, but ask any woman and most of the time, she'll explain that she's the one who manages the household.

I don't even bother telling my husband what's happening until the morning of.

And when the kids are on a school break, I tell him, 

"Oh, by the way honey, it's half-term."

He looks at me with big open eyes like it's fresh news to him and he had no idea, let alone was it even on his radar of need-to-know-knowledge,

"Oh? Is it? Ok. What are you doing with them?"

(sigh)

Anyway, are moms the CEOs?

Well, however it is in your household, here's something you can listen to when you're next taking out the trash or doing the dishes.

It's my newest podcast episode.

My guest and I talk about how mothers are leaders, just like the CEOs of the world.

It's a great episode, very illuminating!

Listen on iTunes or on my "You're Doing Great Mom" website.

Be sure to subscribe and write a review! I'd be very grateful!

Thanks!

— Dr MaryAnne

 

Sometimes you just gotta boogie down, baby

Yesterday's email was all good and heartfelt.

Actually, I felt a little vulnerable there, to be totally honest with you.

A lot of my friends commented on my blog post about being broody by saying,

"Go for it. Have another baby!"

No way.

Anyway, that wasn't the point of the message.

I want to put more energy into my family.

My fun and crazy kids.

My husband.

And all the stress, joy, chaos, and spontaneity about it all!

Time to embrace it more!

I know that in about 30 years I'll be exhaling in joy, so proud and happy that I took this time to be fully present with my brood.

I know it'll all be worth it.

When I first became a mother 11.5 years ago, I had a really hard time going through the change from being such a career-driven woman, in New York City, always thinking about me, me, me, into being a new mother and experiencing such a new reality with a tiny human being.

It was hard.

And really uncomfortable.

I didn't like it.

But I knew in my heart this is what I wanted to do.

Now, I'm overwhelmed with the same drive, the same motivation to make some changes.

Change.

Some very physical and concrete: a huge house renovation, which will require us to move out temporarily so the builders can get in there and get it done.

We'll be living in a small flat during this time.

The five of us.

What could go wrong?

Five very big and loud people who like to demand space and their presence to be known.

I find myself stepping into a familiar feeling of discomfort.

I'm really uncomfortable.

And I'm not liking it.

Thoughts of doubt are creeping in. 

Thinking of the unknown.

How am I going to get through this?

The feeling of instability is very scary.

It's like a huge stretch and I don't think I can bend anymore.

Still, I'm standing my ground, remembering my purpose, my love for my kids, and how this time will bring me to a new place of freedom and joy in my life because I know it's what I want.

And that's the key. 

I WANT so many things in life, and sometimes to get there, to be that person, well, it takes a little instability and stretching along the way.

So I stick to what I know works best for me.

Eating well.

Sleeping well.

Exercising regularly.

Getting adjusted every week.

Creating my structure and sticking to it.

Choosing to do things that make me happy, and not feel guilty about it.

And, for me, it also doesn't hurt to have a nice glass of red wine every now and then.

Today, I've spent a big chunk of time doing things for my practice (like writing this to you guys).

Admin.

Organising notes.

And in between my thoughts I've been pausing to blast some good tunes, get up, and dance for 10 minutes just to get the blood to flow.

It feels good.

Gotta keep following my heart and passion. Stay on the path!

See you soon at your next adjustment!

Stay on YOUR path!

— Dr MaryAnne




 

I am broody

Many friends of mine tell me that I should have a fourth.

Baby, that is.

Another one?

Nope.

I'm done.

In fact, when I was preggers with my third child (who just turned six, by the way), I had a very direct and concrete feeling that I did NOT want to have another.

I was crystal clear DONE at three.

BUT.

There's an ongoing problem.

In my line of work, seeing many newborns regularly, holding them, adjusting them - it really messes with my head. 

And heart.

And my ovaries.

But again, when I think about having another newborn, I quickly snap out of it (most of the time) and land back on the ground.

Reality.

This really tested me though over the summer holidays.

I took a lot of time off to be with my family, driving out to France, frolicking on the beach and ocean in the Atlantic, drinking lots of wine, and eating lots of cheese and French baguettes. 

What more could a girl want?

Yum.

Anyway, my last trip wasn't REALLY a holiday. Well, it was, but the main purpose was to help my sister.

I was her birth partner.

For those of you who have had a baby, you know that the last couple weeks of pregnancy, especially if you have a two-year-old running around, it's so exhausting. 

Just take my word for it.

So I was there to help out my sister at the end of her pregnancy while we waited for her to go into labour.

And just as I predicated, she went into labour in the middle of my stay with her. 

Very convenient.

And she went into labour at a very sensible hour right after we all woke up in the morning.

Labour was quick, easy-peasy, and she gave birth to healthy hefty baby boy.

Then I finally got to hold him.

After all that time waiting!

And then the broodiness kicked in.

Oh boy.

He was so delicious to hold and snuggle with. 

Newborns are magical.

One of the most common things we think about when holding a brand new baby, just a couple hours old, is trying to comprehend that this baby was JUST inside another human being living and growing.

That never ceases to amaze me.

And these newborns hold so much purity and potential inside of them.  

That's what they smell like!

I had about nine more days with my sister to help her with her new baby, and I really savoured every minute with them.

(Her husband threatened to kidnap me because I was such a huge help in keeping the baby from crying.)

As the days went by being around my sister's family that went from three to four, I also missed my crazy gang back home.

My kids are much older than my sister's and it's like a whole other stage that I'm in with them.

Yet, it's bittersweet.

Each time I held my sister's baby (or played with her two-year-old), a new feeling came over me stronger and stronger, realising something.

It's the concept that we parents get told by our elders all the time:

"They grow too fast."

Of course, conceptually, it's easy to understand.

And I see it before my eyes with my own children.

But it never hit me the way it did while being away from my kids for over two weeks.

I knew that each day my children were growing and changing, just like all kids, and I was missing those moments.

I wasn't there to do all the things that I normally take for granted.

As mothers, we feel like we're running on a hamster wheel just pushing along trying to keep everyone happy, managing schedules, dinner, laundry, friends, our partners, our relationships.

And it goes on and on, every day.

Being away from my children for 16 days, AND being with my sister's family gave me the opportunity to see things from a completely different perspective. One that made me feel nostalgic knowing what my sister was going through with two children and adapting to everything, as well as another perspective making me see how every single minute of our babies' lives are opportunities to make them feel loved, appreciated, and secure.

When I came home last week, I was able to hug my kids with that new perspective, cherishing so much more how grateful I am that I have them, and that they are who they are, happy and healthy.

NOW I get the concept fully in a renewed way, so much so that I've taken more time to be with them, rather than constantly try to find some of my own free time.

One day I'll be 85, and I definitely don't want to find myself sitting there alone, in my favourite comfortable chair feeling regret about my children, wishing that I had spent more time with them.

I'll never get these days back.

Even now my memory is skittish, not remembering certain moments of my children's lives. Those little detailed things I did like how I potty trained my daughter, or when did they first sleep through the night.

Now I know that I don't want to miss anything.

My eyes have opened.

Which is why I've changed my time and schedule in my practice to fewer hours in order to put my family fully as a priority.

(Don't worry, I'm still adjusting and I can't wait to adjust you all!)

I know at times when the kids are driving me crazy I'll think, "What was I thinking?" I'll want to get away and escape.

But, the difference is that I'll realise that this moment, right now, I get to hug my children more and anytime I want when I spend more time with them.

And when I'm 85, I'll think back and say to myself, "It was alllll worth it."

(Be sure to keep checking my schedule to book yourself in for your next adjustment.)

— Dr MaryAnne