When your husband asks you what you want for Christmas

Last week when I saw a friend of mine, he out of the blue said with frustration,

"I will never understand women."

I giggled inside, smiled at him and replied, "Stop right there. Don't even go any further."

He attempted to explain.

I just shook my head.

He's about ten years younger than me, so maybe he still hasn't learned.

Poor chap. He was trying to figure out something about his wife, and I simply told him to stop comparing how men and women think.

There wasn't much problem solving happening, but then again, this topic always leaves people feeling confused and unfulfilled.

In another conversation I had a few days later in my practice, as I was finishing up a wonderful adjustment with one of my pregnant practice members, she started to tell me how much she loves the adjustments.

"MaryAnne, you have no idea how much you've helped me. It's changed my life. I can actually feel good every day in my pregnancy. You have magic hands."

Of course I was flattered.

(The magic actually happens inside her body. The adjustments help make that happen.)

She was telling me how much she loves the adjustments and she continued,

"Just the other day, my husband asked me what I want for Christmas. Now, he doesn't get surprised easily. Do you know what I said to him? I said that I want him to buy me a year's worth of adjustments with you, MaryAnne. THAT surprised him!"

She told me that he didn't understand.

Her husband said, "Are you sure? You're pregnant. Just think about it for a few days."

Well, sure, she's pregnant. And little does he know that pregnant women, although sometimes forgetful, they are sharper and more sensitive and perceptive than ever.

They have to be.

They are preparing to give birth and bring their child into this world. They need to be highly sensitive and perceptive!

My advice to her husband (and to my male friend) is to stop trying to figure out women, pregnant or not, and just accept that they won't understand much of what women will say, think, or feel.

That's just the way it is.

As for all the husbands out there, in my opinion, getting your wife a year's worth of adjustments is a brilliant idea.

When we ALL get adjusted, women AND men, we are healthier, happier, and enjoy life more.

Men are simple. I know this much.

And if your wife is feeling happy and healthy, then everyone else in the family will probably be happy and healthy.

It's a good deal.

In my practice, a year's worth of adjustments is £1450 for up to 2 adjustments a week.

For a whole year.

That's a great deal.

It's the most cost effective plan I have.

So if you're not sure what to buy your spouse, consider buying the year-long wellness package!

See you at your next adjustment!

— MaryAnne

PS - You could also get your spouse a massage session!

PPS - I asked my husband to proof-read a draft of this email. He said, "Your email is soft and cuddly and sensitive, but makes no sense to my male mind. I am wise enough not to ask."

Which is what I was saying!

Do not ask men to observe their emotions

My Family Plan means that men come in to my office with their families. It seems obvious that, as my husband describes it, “they are under orders from the boss”. How do I get them to engage? (And some need to. Their spines are a mess!)

After the adjustment, how about asking, “How do you feel?”

Absolutely not. No. Do not ask men to observe their emotions.

“How do I feel? Err, usual, I guess.” “How do I feel? Err, like it’s Friday afternoon and I’m not in the pub. Which isn’t good.” “How do I feel? Err…” — turns to wife — “darling, how do I feel?” 

Women often report feeling excellent. A good proportion of mothers report that their children are better (symptoms lessened, behaviour calmer, sleeping longer and more deeply, eating heartily, passing Cambridge entrance examinations, whatever).

But most men don’t report at all. Or don't know what to report. 

Is this my fault? Are my hands better on women and children? Or is this men being insufficiently self-aware to feel better? Hence, failing to observe being better? Or is this men being too shy to admit to an improvement — would it mean admitting that the wife was correct?

A few men, but only a few, do say that they’re better. I told my husband, who said “They’re only saying they feel better because they know that if they don’t appear to respond positively, they won’t get laid.” Men! So if they don’t say they feel better, it might be because they do feel better and don’t want to admit that. And if they do say, it might be because they don’t—but of course want to feel better in every man’s favourite way of feeling better. 

My oh my: and men say that women are complicated!

My message to these men (and women) is that if you're judging how healthy you are by the presence or absence of pain, then you're going at it all wrong. If you've ever been in pain, and then it went away, that's just 10% of what your system is working on.

The rest of the situation, the 90%, is what needs continuous work. Pain is only 10% of the way. 

You need to also factor in the remaining 90% to be healthy and stay healthy.

That's why getting your spine adjusted regularly is important.