friends

The Perks of Being Married to a Brit

It's been a busy few months in my home and my home practice.

The change created a settling period and I also went away to attend a few seminars.

Life's been busy!

One of the seminars was in Washington DC for a huge pediatric and family chiropractic wellness seminar, hosted by the International Chiropractic Pediatric Association, of which I am an active member.

And because I was all the way over the pond, I of course had to make a stop into New York City, my hometown, on my way back to London.

My close friend insisted she take me out to dinner since we only had 24 hours together.

So we wanted to make the best of it.

We went all the way downtown in SoHo to this fantastic restaurant, with a fantastic wine list. 

I had purposefully not eaten lunch because I really wanted to indulge and eat tons of food at this place, as well as letting myself share a bottle of red wine with my good friend.

The food was incredibly delicious (I had this amazing scallop dish with squid and sea urchin risotto!).

My friend had a juicy fillet of steak (for which they are famously known).

The conversation was rolling, as was the time and of course, the wine. 

Pretty quickly, we downed the whole bottle of wine.

We couldn't muster up ordering another one, so we just said, "We'll just have another glass of red please."

Right.

Can you guess what happened?

We ordered a few more glasses between each other, and I could tell we passed a certain point of no return.

At least my friend did.

Interestingly, I was feeling great. 

Not too inebriated.

Just right.

However, I could tell that my friend was getting a little bit loud.

We stayed enjoying our meal and wine until the place was nearly empty and the staff was even heading home.

It was time to hail a cab.

I was still feeling fine, but my friend wasn't even able to walk straight towards the taxi.

We get in, and I immediately see her open the window and stick her head out.

Sick.

All the way back uptown.

On one hand, I was grateful that I didn't feel sick like her.

Then, on the other hand, I thought, "Is this what living in the UK with a British husband does?"

Serious Liver Training.

AKA Very Slow Alcohol Titration Training.

I texted my husband at 2:30am New York time to tell him that there might be schools closing because of a water main pipe bursting and some people had no water in Streatham.

His reply, "What the hell are you doing up?"

"We just got home."

"[surprise emoticon]"

"And you would be 'proud' of me. Your wife-married-to-a-Brit didn't get sick like her American friend wife-married-to-an-American."

Yes people. It's the little things in life that make it all fun and interesting.

And marriage interesting as well.

Bottom line is, I wasn't proud.

In fact, I got back to London and things got busier and busier in the practice.

And then after a few weeks, I realised that it had been nearly a month since I last got adjusted.

(Cue in the Shock Horror music)

I know. Crazy, right?

And guess what, I have had to do some serious catching up to get my system back online, back into high energy-richness, and feeling great.

That's what happens when I neglect what's the most important to me.

(And too much wine drinking.)

My health.

The way I keep myself strong and energised is from my regular adjustments.

I let myself go.

And it was a huge wake-up call.

This past week since Easter I've been adjusted twice already, and I've got my adjustments lined up for myself next week too.

When's the last time you got adjusted?

Do you feel the difference if you miss your adjustment?

Being married to a Brit definitely has its perks, but he's not going to adjust my spine and make my life perfect. 

That's my job.

I'm responsible for that.

So, come on over to my home practice where it's super cozy and really great.

And you get an awesome adjustment!

See you soon!

— Dr MaryAnne


 

A lil' sumthin sumthin

I used to live in Queens, New York when I was little.

That was about forty years ago (holy moley, that sounds like ages ago).

I remember once, when I was about 7 years old, being with my friend playing at our school playground, and some boys were bothering us.

You could say they were being bullies, but at the time, I just thought they were trouble makers.
 
They wouldn't stop calling us names, annoying us, and trying to be tough.

Then, they started chasing us.

I remember feeling scared, not knowing what I did to make them do this, and were they intending on hurting us?

I hated that feeling of fear.

I remember at one point I was running, trying to get away, feeling terrified, and then suddenly, something came over me.

I think my thoughts were saying, "This-is-crazy-I-don't-like-this-I-feel-so-scared-and-threathened-make-this-situation-stop-what-can-I-do"

And I just stopped running.

Then I turned around, held my arm and hand out signalling for them to stop.

They just stopped in their tracks.

I just stood my ground, breathing out of breath from all the running, and said something like,

"Listen, why are you chasing us? Wouldn't it be better if we all got along, worked something out? We can be friends. I think we could be friends."

You know what?

Just like that, the kids shrugged their shoulders, and just like that said, "OK."

I remember thinking, "Whoa, I did not expect THAT outcome."

In fact, I had no idea what would happen.

My adrenalin was pumping and flooding my body, I probably would have been able to pick up a car.

My fear had turned into action. 

Action to create solutions.

To connect with people.

Find that lil' sumthin sumthin.

It was like a snap and the boys switched from attackers to our friends.

I called my other friend who was way down the street by then, and we all just worked something out.

I think I've always had the natural sense of, "This person is nice. He has love and greatness in him too."

Even at the age of seven.

That's how I've always been.

I always see the greatness in people.

Love is there.

In all humans.

That's how I approach everyone. 

Or at least, that's how I want to be.

Somehow, innately and intuitively, when I was a little girl I accessed that desire to connect with people and speak into their side of love and greatness.

I'm happy I never lost that.

That's what I bring into my practice every day with everyone, all the time.

That's why I love adjusting people.

I love it.

Greatness and love.

To me, it's awesomeness.

— Dr MaryAnne

 

One of my good friends seems to be having a mid-life crisis.

... or not.

Whatever it is, I will continue to love her unconditionally through what she's dealing with.

At first I got offended and hurt, with my ego all fluffed up. The feeling sat with me for a day and a half.

I was really really pissed off about it.

But then I realised that this doesn't serve me, it doesn't serve her, and it definitely doesn't do our friendship any good.

She's like a sister to me. I consider her my family. And families stick together when the going gets tough for anyone. 

So I choose to stay open in my heart, love her, listen to her, and continue to support her.

I've noticed over the years that when people in our lives go into 'hiding' and stay quiet, don't communicate much, no texts, emails, or phone calls, it's because they are going through something.

A break in anyone's pattern is indication that something's off.

And in my opinion, it's when they need the most compassion, understanding, and love. 

Because for the most part, nearly everyone around them will take offence, make it about themselves, take it personally, and then say something like, 

"FINE. BE THAT WAY!"

I did that.

But luckily I got over myself pretty fast and realised that I love this friend, and even though she's needing some space, doesn't agree with me, or just feels like she needs some time, I'm not going to let that create this downward spiral of anger, hurt, hostility, and judgement.

Giving people that love, openness, and compassion is what's missing among relationships. 

By default, it's always about me, me, me. 

"WHAT ABOUT ME?" We scream inside. Like toddlers. ME! ME! ME!

Well, recognising that it's not always about me is the first step. 

Getting over myself is the next.

And finally, choosing to love my friend no matter what is an ongoing choice, hoping that she'll get the message.

I wish I could see her soon to give her an adjustment because I know she loves that and it helps! 

In the meantime, I know I can adjust you, so better book in and come over for your adjustment!

With love and compassion,

Dr MaryAnne